Hello there all you wonderful people.
It’s my Day Twenty-Nine entry of NanoPoblano AKA National Blog Posting Month (but with colourful individuals known as Cheer Peppers), I’m back with another video stuffed full of classic comedy thrills, spills and chills.
Check out the Facebook Live performance of my latest poem.
The inspiration for this particular poem came about from how most of the time I would imagine that people don’t like being told what to do. I thought it would be amusing to explore this concept with a person who is acting childish and ignoring sound advice being given to him, just simply because he doesn’t want to be controlled, forcing him to do the opposite of things everyone tells him to do.
Also, since I am such a happening kitty cat, here are some other alternative prompts to help you get freaky with your own poetry:-
And finally here is my poem in written form for you to enjoy the sprawling, unhinged madness of it all, hopefully with a slice of something delicious washed down with a piping hot beverage 🙂
Photo by Lolame from Pixabay
“I Do The Opposite Of What People Tell Me To Do” by David Ellis
I don’t know about you
But I hate being told what to do
It makes we want to rebel
It makes me want to raise hell!
When people tell me what to do
I end up going a little crazy
There’s only one option laid out on the table
For me to do the opposite without fail
They say “Don’t go out with her, she’s clearly trouble!”
So I say “My schedule just became free. Let’s both get married tomorrow!”
And then when the whole thing ends up in a messy divorce
They say “Well, we knew it would, of course!”
To whit, I reply “Go now and leave town on your lousy, stinking horse!”
While I go lick my wounds, they come in for the kill again
They say “Don’t run with scissors or go dancing without sensible shoes!”
So I say “After you’ve surgically removed the scissors from my hips,
I can use them to help with the blisters on my toes.”
They then say “Ugh! That’s gross!”
And I usually go off with a huff and a puff
While I’m turning up my nose, they climb aboard the fault train again
They say “Don’t eat all that cake or you will get fat!”
I say “What cake? I ate it in fifteen seconds flat!”
They then say “Don’t speak with your mouth full or you will scare small children!”
I say “Mummpgh Pghnnnh Gnnngorgogon!” while a sea of little people drench me in tears yelling, screaming, pointing at me, calling me a clown
At this point, things have reached boiling point and someone needs to intervene
They say “Please, I’m begging you, this nonsense has simply got to stop!”
I say “Hah! Good luck. We’re just getting started!”
They say “Granted but what if we tell you to do the opposite of the opposite of what we tell you to do?”
At which point my brain explodes, I dribble for hours and everyone else goes home
Everyone except me because I don’t follow the herd but…
All my money and possessions are at home, along with my wife, dogs, cars and jars of pickled onions…
How could I give up any single one of those things?
Could it be that I was wrong all along?
No, of course not, it’s the opposite!
Now I’ve gone and got myself in an all confused state
Is there more cake? Somebody tell me that I’m not to eat it
Because then I will and you can all go to hell in a handcart!
At least until tomorrow, I’m feeling tired now
They told me not to sleep three days ago,
Although I admit I was driving at the time
Guess I will take a nap with one eye closed
Nobody tells me what to do!
Not any more anyway
I wonder why?
Still want more? Well I’m sure I could rummage around in my drawers (oh do behave!) and find something to keep you happy. How about some other Day Twenty-Nine posts by talented ladies and men who have participated in the Pepper challenge throughout the month of November 🙂